Mother’s Day 2015

Healing Path Thoughts: Mother’s Day: May 10, 2015

Well, it’s Mother’s Day and I am wondering: How many other moms today are missing their children like I am?

And likewise: How many children are missing their moms?

In world where families are separated by so many circumstances there are many among us who are not gathering today with children or moms for brunch and flowers. For women who are, my prayer is that you may truly absorb the Miracle of having three generations at your table today.

If we are not in that category, how do we brave Mother’s Day without our children? Although I lost my daughter Alexis and my son Emanuel I still have my living son Zachary to spend the day

with. I suppose he validates my “mother” role as a current one. But if Zach is to pre-decease me at some future time, will I still feel as though future “Mother’s Day” applies to me?

And for women who have given their blood, sweat, tears and prayers to advanced science in the face of an inability to conceive a child, how do they face the day? Even if they can celebrate their own mom, is it just an annual reminder that they dreamt an impossible dream? Or if they miscarried a pregnancy, do they feel misplaced each time we celebrate Mother’s Day?

I am so Blessed to still have my own mom in my life. In her early 70s she still finds new ways to support my life and expand her own. But many moms have been removed from their children at younger ages, through illness or circumstance. How are those daughters and sons who do not have their moms with them, to participate in this event? What chords of grief are stricken for them every year in early May when we are mandated to recognize and celebrate our mothers? What feelings are evoked in the hearts of adopted children, perhaps never having known their biological moms and having unspoken conversations linger in their minds?

As I break bread today with my mom and my 15 year old son (who will have brunch through his life-long feeding tube) I am overwhelmed with gratitude. I will light candles for my daughter Alexis and my son Emanuel, as I often do when I crave a tangible representation of their spirits at my table. I will focus on my intention of being present for all of the ways I am loved today. I will sharpen my awareness to the conversations, the smiles, the smells of the meal and the way I have been taught that love is our birthright, whether received through biological moms or others who see our light.

I will also hold gently, the hearts of those who are without their children or their moms today. I

will ask God to bring Grace to their days today. I will recognize that we all experience losses and have ideas about ways in which we think our lives would be better if they were different. I will pray for them to find love in unsuspecting places and for there to be Peace in places that have jagged edges. I say a special prayer for those who longed for motherhood, but never experienced the miracle of life to be born through them. I will pray for all of us to trust God and know that we are all connected on Mother’s Day, and every day.

Thank you for the time and space to share these thoughts. Humbly, Lisa